![stefamerpik](https://wealthydriver.com/storage/app/media/wealthydriver/2023/03/stefamerpik.jpg)
Oh, the joys of living in close proximity to other humans you barely know. Sometimes your neighbors are lovely; sometimes they become your best friends. Other times you end up putting super glue in their doorbell or playing satanic chants below their window each night.
Maybe you yourself have even struggled with them and wished you could get payback. Well, these people actually did! Read on for some very entertaining stories about the revenge people got on their bad neighbors.
1. Sneaky Sock Thief
Unsplash @Nick Page
My roommate in college had an “only child syndrome” and taped a piece of paper over her clock because she didn’t want to “share it with me.” Never mind that she couldn’t see the clock herself, but she would rather no one see the clock than share the clock with my eyes.
So, from then on, I would steal one sock from a set once a week. It was slow enough that she didn’t realize it was me sabotaging her socks but fast enough for her to be really annoyed and wondering what in the world was happening to all of her matching socks.
2. Let The Poop War Begin
Pixabay
Someone constantly took their dogs out to poop on the front yard of our apartment complex. I was really certain it was the people with three dogs that barked at everyone through the front window in the adjacent complex. Large dogs were banned in our complex but three different times carefully walking through our lawn, I tracked dog poops into my house. I watched really carefully, I needed visual confirmation it was them, not just circumstantial evidence. After about 4 months, I caught them taking their dogs out to poop in my apartment’s yard and not cleaning it up.
I went outside just afterward and stuck a grocery bag on my hand. I picked up about 3 months’ worth of poop and threw it all on their front porch and against their front door. They definitely knew I was doing it because all three dogs were barking at me through the window and I caught a glimpse of them witnessing what I was doing. It took about 15 minutes to find every piece of poop I could and put it on their stoop or throw it at their door. They never took their dogs out to poop in my apartment’s yard again.
3. The Hottest Pool In Town
Pexels @Pixabay
Once, while my husband was still living with his elderly mother, one of her neighbors tore down her fence (which was on the property line) and built his pool so that was beyond the property line.
When my husband complained, the neighbor was very offensive. My husband is a gardener and grows hot peppers, so he took some of the hottest and distilled the juice from them, making them even hotter. He soaked a paper towel in the juice and threw it into the pool, where the juice floated on top.
4. If Only He Had Some Balls
Freepik @cookie_studio
This happened a few years ago when I was in college. I went to one of the largest schools in my state, so naturally, there was a lot of partying. One year, I was living off-campus in a smaller apartment and we were playing video games in our living room with some music on. Our neighbors downstairs decided that they thought our music was too loud (it probably was), but instead of coming up and asking us to turn it down, they called the cops for a noise complaint. When the cops arrived, we opened the door without checking the peephole and just opened the door. We were pretty much arrested immediately for some pot in plain sight on our living room coffee table.
After we get our list of charges, we see, on the sheet, the name of who made the call for the noise complaint, and after some sleuthing on Facebook, we found this guy who was DATING the girl who lived under us, and didn’t even live in our 3 story complex! Come to find out that he drives the only very large, very loud, pickup truck that parks in our lot, and can be heard for miles around. So, you can imagine over the next 10 months, we lived in that apartment he found everything you can think of in the bed of that truck. Ranging from dead animals, rotten meat, and the grand finale being an entire parking block from the other side of the lot. Also, during the last week we lived in the complex, we decided his truck didn’t need the hitch on the back of it anymore, so we threw it out for him. He should’ve had the balls to come and ask us to turn down our music in person and save all of us a misdemeanor charge we had to pay for.
5. Me Vs. The World
Pexels @Mihis Alex
I received a parking notice on my vehicle telling me my car was abandoned and will be towed to a city compound for not being moved. My car was parked in one spot legally, is registered and insured, and was only there for two days. This was on a residential street in front of my condo. When I noticed the slip on my window and went to investigate what it was, I noticed another person two condos over leering at me with a sense of accomplishment. I called the city information line and explained the situation. They retorted with “anyone can legally call on any car and without the real knowledge if the car moves daily or not get a notice placed within the day. The city is just doing their job.” I was frustrated but then asked the person if that was the case and without any investigation, l could theoretically call every vehicle on the street for abandonment and they would have to then just “do their job.” They replied with, “Seems like more trouble than it seems but sure,” not realizing that my pettiness knows no bounds. I did just that. I took photos of everyone’s license plate parked on the street, entered each vehicle into my city’s online site and within two hours a city vehicle had shown up to unleash my devious plan.
While taking the picture of one of the cars, the person leering at me before came out of his door and asked, “Why are you photographing my car? This is a private neighborhood!” Whatever he was trying to say was obviously blinded by rage, and I just proceeded to give a devilish smile and walked into my unit. My city worker hero called me, as you must provide loose info before entering vehicle complaints and I answered and explained what had all unfolded throughout the day, not leaving any parts out or any lack of info on what my part in all this was. He laughed, amused at what I had devised, and replied with “This is the easiest last two hours of my night, thank you for this.” I laughed said no problem and went to sleep with every vehicle with a parking complaint.
6. The Best Way To Deal With The Worst Parker
Freepik @wayhomestudio
There’s a new truck in my apartment’s parking lot. It is always taking up multiple spots, ALWAYS. Weird angles, close to the stairs, all over the place (no assigned parking, unfortunately). We endured months of this. I drive a much smaller car than that, and I’m petty/passive-aggressive, so I’ve been waiting for my chance. A few days ago was my shot. I got home quite late and there were zero spots open in my lot. The big truck is double-parked again, but there’s just enough room on their driver side for me to sneak in there with my little clown car. I carefully pull in, making sure not to touch anything, no damage, no nothing. My passenger side mirror is half an inch from the truck’s driver side door. My car’s already a bit dinged up, so I wasn’t too concerned about the truck owner doing any damage to my car. I giggled to myself all the way back to my apartment and set an alarm and waited.
The following morning, I woke up before the alarm to loud door slamming and stomping around. I check out my window and I see the double parking culprit walking around both vehicles, taking pictures, texting someone, taking more pictures, I’m shaking with glee. He then swallows his pride, let out a visual sigh, and climbs in the passenger side, clambered over the center console, and does a 20-point turn out of the spot. I haven’t seen the truck in a couple of days, thinking they might be street parking it from here on out. I’ve never been so proud of myself and my petty, passive-aggressive ways.
7. Groundhog For The Evil Hag
Unsplash @Jack Bulmer
So this is pretty messed up but here it goes: I once lived in an apartment with my best friend. It was not a nice place, but the price was right. Our neighbor on one side was a middle-aged lady with two sons. Let’s say 13- and 16-years-old. These boys were all gothed out and kind of weird, but they seemed to be good kids. They were always outside sitting on our shared steps. After we had been there for a while we figured out why. Their mother was absolutely terrible to these boys. Through our thin walls, we could hear the daily verbal abuse, constant yelling and name-calling. As a result, we hated this lady. She was a terrible person. We would occasionally let the boys come in and play video games or hang out for a few minutes if it was raining or cold, so they didn’t have to go home.
One night, my friend and I get wasted and somehow find a freshly dead groundhog. This evil lady’s car happened to be unlocked, so we gutted this dead groundhog and shoved it under her driver’s seat. It was like the middle of summer. You can imagine the stench that must have come from that car. The car did not move for three or four days. Then one day it was gone and we never saw it again. We didn’t put much thought into our stupid plan and, unfortunately, a few days later we heard the lady blaming one of the kids for the car. She didn’t say a lot about it and, of course, the kids didn’t know a thing about it. This was years ago and I’m not proud of what we did, but that’s not to say that evil hag didn’t deserve it!
8. The Real Genius
Unsplash @Maurice Williams
My brother bought a house in an HOA area; however, he never signed up. This was a very new cookie-cutter neighborhood. The neighbors and the HOA were extremely rude and nosy. He basically bought the place partially finished so he could finish it himself to create value before selling it. During this time, they would spy on him, call the cops on him, and just act like petty fools, so he checked the HOA rules and found they had very strict conformity rules for the neighborhood. He decided to get revenge by doing things that added value that would cost everyone else, like putting in trees and other nice landscaping. His neighbors had no choice but to conform to what he was doing. He did something, and a few days to a week later everyone else followed suit.
In the end, his landscaping and remodeling of the house increased the value of his home by a decent margin beyond the original plan. He said that in the end everyone really hated him, and was surprised that no one marched on his home with pitchforks, but in the end, he didn’t care. He said if the HOA was smart enough they could have changed the rules at the first sign of trouble anyway. He was so glad to sell the place and move on. He now has a large ranch home far, far away from anyone.
9. Tough Luck, My Friend
Freepik @wayhomestudio
I had someone park in my assigned covered space at midnight on a Saturday. This has happened more than once. One time, I called management to have them towed. Management tells me they don’t tow anymore because they would have to pay because it was private property so, “tough luck.” I parked behind them and blocked them in. There was a block wall in front. I left the neighbors each a note on their door letting them know if they needed to leave, knock on my door. At 10 am, frantic pounding on my door, me in pajamas, some girl hysterical that she had to go to work and was going to lose her job. I asked her if she knew it was reserved parking, she said yes, it was midnight and there were no other parking spaces and she didn’t want to street park and walk because it wasn’t safe. I asked her why she was okay with making me park on the street and walk after midnight? She told me she was going to have me towed. I laughed and went back to bed.
The management called me to tell me I am blocking someone in and if I don’t move, they will have me towed. I relate the conversation from the middle of the night, the “tough luck” part, and told them if they tow me instead of the violator in my spot, I am going to sue them for failing to enforce the rules, endangering my safety because the reason I parked that way was because it was after midnight and “everyone knows it is not safe to park on the street and walk.” I offer to wait for the tow truck then move so they can tow the “parking violator.” The management told the girl “tough luck.” She is back pounding on my door and screaming. People are now calling management about the lunatic “trying to break into someone’s apartment.” The guy she banged the night before shows up to my door. The girl is at the bottom of the stairs crying so hard she has the hiccups. The guy apologizes profusely, said he didn’t know she parked in my spot. He apologized again and offered me money for my trouble. I told him that wasn’t necessary, I was just waiting for the girl to apologize. He nodded, went downstairs, yelled at her and pointed up to me. She came upstairs and apologized and I moved my car.
10. Loud Problem, Solved!
Freepik @wayhomestudio
Years ago, I lived on a street that had another street branch off of it two doors down from my house. At the end of the other street was a group of younger dealers that rode scooters to do their business around town (I knew this because one of my friends bought from them on a regular basis). All hours of the day and night these stupid scooters buzzed up and down the street. A couple of them didn’t have mufflers, so they were LOUD.
I called the cops, but they were useless. I came up with the bright idea of spreading cinderblock grit (the material cinderblocks were made of) in the corner where the streets intersected. This material was gray, and it was like little ball bearings when spread on the pavement. I got a bucket of the grit and proceeded to spread it all over the corner. About that time, I heard the buzz of a scooter coming down the street. I literally had to jump over a fence into some bushes to avoid being seen. The scooter/dealer dude hit the corner and the scooter FLEW out from under him. It sounded like a car crash. No injuries, and just a broken mirror on the scooter. The whole bunch of them moved three days later and it started raining about a day later and most of it washed away. Looking back on it, someone could have been injured, but they were dealers and they were a huge neighborhood nuisance. I took care of the problem.
11. Blowing Fuses
Freepik @pvproductions
When I was in college with a room in the dorms, a room on my floor would blare loud music at annoying times – even past the normal party range for the floor. Some of us had previously discovered that if you overloaded the fuses on one wall in a room, the room on the other side would also lose the outlets on the shared wall. And there were no outlets on the outside wall or the wall facing the hallway.
So one Friday night, the plan went into action. The two rooms on either side of these guys had plugged tons of electronic gear into the outlets, all turned off. People had contributed things to help out. The music went up, and the other rooms flipped everything on. Boom. Fuses tripped, offending room (and half of each of the two adjoining rooms) lost power. The dudes complained, other guys made comments about how it’s an old building, they must have finally “overloaded the circuits” or whatever, and what with dealing with slow university electrician service on the weekends (they still had overhead lights, just no outlets), they decided to not push their luck again.
12. Extra Thirty A Month
Pexels @Karolina Grabowska
My downstairs neighbor at my old apartment was most likely an illegal dealer. He didn’t have a job, and cars would come by at all hours of the day or night, often honk loudly, then he or his girlfriend would run out and chat with them for like five minutes and the car would drive off. The slinging didn’t bother me, but the honking at all hours did. It would wake my girlfriend and I up at all hours of the night. Frequently his clients and friends would be parked taking up two spaces when I came home from work, throwing off our already crowded parking scheme. His own vehicle was parked in such a way that if he had moved a few feet closer to the house we could have another spot, but his car didn’t actually run so he couldn’t move it.
At one point, he started dating a woman with three kids, and when they were over they’d leave their bike and toys in the parking lot or in front of our steps so we’d have to dodge them in the morning. She also had a small dog, and while she was usually good about cleaning up its poo piles, she would still miss them from time to time. It was all minor annoyances, so I decided to pay him back in the pettiest way possible. Each floor paid for their own electricity. I knew our downstairs landing light was on his circuit since it worked before we set up power to our apartment and didn’t work for the few weeks between the previous tenant moving out and him moving in. It was an old incandescent bulb, not an energy-efficient one like we had at the top of the stairs and throughout our apartment. After his friend took up two parking spaces for like three days when his truck died in our parking lot, I never turned that light off. It was probably costing him an extra thirty a month in electricity! Okay, pretty stupid, but I was really happy about it.
13. The CATastrophic Complainant
Pexels @Bruno Abdiel
My crazy neighbor tried hard to find any reason to complain about us to the landlord. One day, she complained about getting cat hair in her apartment and tried to get the landlord to force us to get rid of them. It was highly unlikely since our cats don’t go out, they don’t go in the hallway, and it was winter so there is no way the hair was falling off our clothing under a winter coat.
I’m a very zen person but this pissed me off so much because she has absolutely no reason to hate us and we never reply to her constant provocations. I knew the landlord couldn’t force us to get rid of the cats cause it’s written in the lease agreement. So that night, I brushed my two cats, I got all the hair I could gather and I spread it all over the hallway. Lots of them. I know it was childish but totally worth it. She got the message that I was done with her crap and since then, she’s actually being nice to me.
14. Color Coding Housing Uniform
Pexels @Pixabay
My wife and I just bought our first house in May of this year. It’s in a decent neighborhood on the outskirts of a small town. I’m currently building a 20×24 garage. The slab is going to be poured next week and I hired some Amish to frame and sheath it. One day, I found a printed piece of paper in my mailbox without any postage. It said a fence had to be white. I already hand-built my fence and painted it white only because white barn paint was on sale. It also said any detached buildings have to have the same siding and the same shingles as the house. I already bought the shingles for super cheap, since the warehouse they were in burnt down, so I got a great of a deal, but they were different than my house. Plus I didn’t want MY garage to match the ugly light brown siding of my house. I threw the paper away before I even finished reading it all.
I’m pretty sure this letter came from the same witch that made me pay $3 for the privilege to participate in a neighborhood yard sale in which I netted a whole $3. Here’s the kicker though. I don’t live in the HOA, so my wife and I are already planning to paint our fence rainbow patterned when we have to repaint it. Not sure what color I’m going to do the siding on my garage though. Maybe blue.
15. Don’t Get Mad, Get Even
Pexels @Karolina Grabowska
I was once made to re-sod my front lawn in the middle of summer with average daily temperatures over 100 degrees. During one of the worst droughts on record, while the whole city was under watering restrictions. In my case, the fine for not re-sodding the lawn by a particular date was $100 per day until it was done. The new lawn (which I had spent several hundred dollars on) promptly died and they tried to make me replace it again, but apparently, enough people had complained by that point that before I did they agreed not to make us replace our lawns until the water restrictions were lifted. The most infuriating part is that there were drought-resistant native grasses I could have planted that would have stayed green (or at least green-ish) during the drought, but they were not on the HOA’s “approved” list.
Confession time: I had to get up early for work (3 am), so as I drove through the neighborhood, I looked for people watering their lawns in the middle of the night on violation of restrictions. Most people were just trying to avoid being hassled by the HOA, I know, so I left them alone. But when I saw members of the HOA board doing it, I reported them to the city.
16. Follow The Rules
Freepik
I used to make music more or less as a part-time job. I moved into a new apartment that had downstairs neighbors. I did absolutely everything I could to be a good neighbor, but every time I would sit down to make music, after about 10 minutes, no matter what time of the day, I would get a banging on the floor/ceiling. This was annoying, but I tried to respect their living space and tried to keep the noise down. Until football season started. Every day that a football game was on, they would scream and shout at the TV. This was my breaking point. I had enough. I went downstairs and tried to talk with the neighbors to ask them why it was fair for them to more or less shut down my workdays, but think it’s okay to scream at the TV when a football game is on. Well, needless to say, the neighbors were obnoxious redneck idiots and tried to fight me instead of talking, so that was it.
I looked up the sound regulations in the neighborhood and made sure I was in the clear. Being a musician, naturally, I had some great speakers that could push some serious volume. For the next three months, every single day, when I would leave for work, I would put on annoying 10-hour YouTube videos at FULL volume. They did everything they could to complain, but since I was keeping within the sound regulations, I was in the clear. They tried to fight with me again after this, but they ended up getting arrested and moved out shortly afterward. All you had to do was let me get my work done!
17. A Minute After Business Hours
Freepik @LipikStockMedia
I went away for a long weekend and left after work on Thursday. Late Friday afternoon, my water heater burst (in the attic of a three-story home) and flooded my entire townhouse. When my neighbor got home from work, he saw gallons of water running from underneath my garage door. When he realized I wasn’t home, he tried to find my phone number and when he couldn’t, he called the HOA to notify me. The lady that answered said that since it was “after business hours (it was 5:01 at this point), the matter would have to wait until Monday.” My wonderful neighbor ended up calling the non-emergency police line and they came and shut my water off from the street. When I got home Sunday morning, my entire house was damaged and I could see my attic from my basement. After a massive panic attack and a frantic call to my insurance company, we started the process of repairs.
The cherry on top was that I needed to have a dumpster placed in my driveway and a moving pod to remove what was left of my furniture while they began drying out the house and I got a visit from the HOA. They didn’t like how “unsightly” my home had become and wanted these items removed from my driveway. I essentially told them that they could take their complaints and shove them. I got a little revenge too because I stopped paying their stupid fee since they couldn’t fine me before six months and I was moving in less than five months. I’ll never own another home with an HOA ever again.
18. Music Wars
Freepik @pvproductions
I had a neighbor who would bring women back every weekend. Usually, it was cool. I’d hear the bed squeak for 20 seconds, stop, silence, then laughing. I’m not the jealous type in any way, but when he constantly played crappy German house music at 4 in the morning, I started getting pissed.
After talking to him about it, he essentially told me to eff off. So the next time it happened, I YouTubed “babies crying” and put it on full blast through my speaker, which I had sat up against the wall. Needless to say, it stopped after that.
19. What Are Friends Are For
Freepik @diana.grytsku
My house was on the left side of a dead-end street. There was a house at the very end of the street facing the other way with its driveways attached to a different street on the other side. My roommate would always park in the front of our house on the street but leave enough room for cars to get past because the landlord of the other house graveled his back yard so he could use our street to get to the house. It had driveways but they were destroyed and very narrow up a hill and had to be repaired to use them.
He left a note on my roommate’s car stating she can’t park there and he would tow her car if she did. I may have gotten irrationally pissed off by this old man trying to bull a house full of college girls. So I did what any good friend would do. I called my friend who was a civil engineer intern for the city and he got the city to put up guard rails at the end of the street so he could no longer use his backyard as an entrance and had to spend the money to fix its driveways.
20. Karma Did The Job
Unsplash (Clark V.)
Not revenge, but karma. When I was a broke college student, the high schoolers down the street sideswiped my car so bad my front door wouldn’t open all the way and the mirror was gone. I confronted them but couldn’t prove it. I couldn’t afford to fix it.
The next week, they come screeching out of the neighborhood while I’m studying next to the second-floor window. They crash headlong into a tree and total their car. I had a comfortable view as all four of them got out and the driver was sobbing his sorry butt shirtless on the pavement till his mom came and cussed him out loud enough for the whole neighborhood to hear.
21. The Virus
Freepik @cookie_studio
In college, I lived in a two-story apartment building. The girl above us was a smoker and had no ashtray. Instead, she just let her butts fall between the cracks in the wooden deck above us, down to our level, usually right on our doormat. I started picking them up and putting them on her doormat. She had the nerve to gripe about me doing that! I told her I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t find them on my doormat.
She stopped, but then she started again later. My roommate dated her roommate and I learned this girl had “cold sores.” So the smoker started receiving a ton of Valtrex brochures and other free literature about curing “cold sores.”
22. Keep It Burning
Freepik @asierromero
My neighbor always calls the cops when we have a fire in our brick-lined fire pit. We’ve tried being polite, and even the cops always apologize saying we are doing nothing wrong but she calls repeatedly until it’s out.
We bought orange Halloween lights and put them in the hole. I had a bunch of friends over and went out pretending to light it while another friend plugged it in. The cops showed about 10 mins later. They laugh and leave. She keeps calling. I’m gonna keep doing it until we can have a real fire again.
23. The Unstoppable Ring
Freepik @jannoon028
I happen to be horribly rancorous. My upper neighbor in my previous apartment made noise every freaking night. He was unemployed and would invite people over and throw a party every night. One day, I asked him to keep it quiet after midnight because I needed sleep and I get up early. He told me to go eff myself because “those laws about that are old.” What was I going to do, call the cops? They would have come, reprimanded this jerk and he would have continued afterward. The guy knew he could mess with me all he wanted.
When I moved to another apartment, mainly due to that, I waited a few months until it was winter and super cold. I made sure he still lived there by checking the name on his doorbell and mailbox. I bought a thing of superglue, went to his apartment at 6 am on my way to work, when it was freezing, pressed his doorbell in and emptied the tube of glue on it. The bell got stuck, forcing him out of his bed. And I did it again a couple of times afterward too because seriously, he was the worst!
24. Hot Bucket Of Poo
Unsplash @Lucas Van Oort
My ex-girlfriend’s neighbor was always accusing her of not picking up after her dog. One day, my ex opens her front door and finds many piles of dog poo there on the step—obviously placed there by the neighbor. My ex then takes a bucket, puts all of the turds inside, fills the bucket with hot water, and walks over to the neighbor’s house.
When the neighbor answers the door, my ex throws the hot bucket of dog poop water right in the lady’s face—and into her house. My ex was arrested for assault. It was worth it though.
25. Bleaching The Problem
Freepik @Pressfoto
I lived in an apartment building with shared laundry. There was one lady across the hall who would ALWAYS take my laundry out of the washer or the dryer mid-cycle and put it on the floor beside the machine so she could wash/dry hers. I have no idea what her issue was. It wasn’t because I left my clothes in the machine because I always set a timer on my phone being overly worried about germs from someone else touching my laundry.
I got really fed up with it one day when I went to switch my laundry from the washer to the dryer and my soaking wet clothes were on the floor. I went back to my apartment, grabbed a bottle of bleach and went back to the laundry room and dumped it in her wash cycle. I knew it was her stuff because she always left her laundry soap on top of the machine. She complained to the building manager and signs went up in the laundry rooms saying to not touch others laundry. She didn’t do it again and I moved out a couple of weeks later.
26. Fake It Till You Make It
Freepik @stefamerpik
My mom had this neighbor who pretended to be weak from cancer/chemo so her landlord couldn’t get mad at her for when trash bins were full and lawn was filthy. She even went as far as shaving her head and faking a limp, cane and everything. My mom baked her some cookies and offered to take care of her bins and lawn until the neighbor spills about her scam. My mom, now enlightened about my neighbor’s The Fault in our Stars crap and tired of the trash blowing into our yard, called the landlord. The neighbor wasn’t happy and would blast music at ungodly hours of the night/wee morning to get back at my mom. My mom would get frustrated because she worked late and left early and filed a noise complaint to the police.
When the police arrive, the neighbor claims my mom (a little old Asian lady) punched her in the chest and the neighbor wants her arrested. My mom then shows cops our security cam footage. There’s no punching; instead, they find the crazy neighbor kicking her 9-year-old daughter out in the middle of the night. The kid is banging on her door, my mom comes out to check on the noise, tries to bring the hysterical girl inside, and the neighbor comes out and sprays her with the hose. The neighbor was arrested, and her daughter was sent to live with dad.
27. Elsa Must Be So Proud
Freepik @wirestock
When living in New York, my husband left for deployment right as winter started. I’m from Arizona, so the snow was a new thing for me. Our neighbors were this horrible couple who thought the world owed them. The husband was an officer and they were both young, this is the norm in a military town. One evening, I come home from work to see about three inches of snow covering our parking lot and a handful of my neighbors are out shoveling. I get out and join them. They did a lot more work than I did but I did get my two reserved spots cleared. I moved my car in and went inside. The next morning, when I leave for work, I notice the neighbors are parked off to the side as they couldn’t get into their spot without shoveling. When I get home from work, I go to pull into my spot but it’s covered in snow, like 6 inches of snow (it hadn’t snowed that day). Then I see the neighbor jerks are parked in their perfect and clean spot. That’s when I realized they just shoveled the snow from their spot into mine instead of piling it to the side like normal people. So I pulled off to the side and waited. They left at 2 am for a party. I went out and re-shoveled the snow from my spot into theirs and then our other neighbor’s snow into their spot as well, packed it down a little too.
My other neighbor comes home around this time, sees what I’ve done and laughs and gives me a high five. He said they do this every time it snows. I went inside, warmed up and went to bed. I was awoken at about 5 am to ticked-off screaming outside. I fell back asleep and woke up at 9 to even angrier screams because apparently, we had some heatwave between 2 and 9 that started to melt the snow and then another freeze that refroze it. So now they were dealing with ice. They never messed with my spot again.
28. Satanic Chants For Religious Chris
Freepik @8photo
This is something that started out as petty revenge but ended up consuming a lot of my free time during my freshman year of high school. So I had a next-door neighbor, who I’ll call “Chris.” Chris wasn’t the worst kid I knew, but if this were Myspace he wouldn’t be on my top 8. Now, for the most part, Chris and I got along well and we would always talk on the way home from school about video games and music and stuff that freshmen talk about. Well, one day, on the way home from school, Chris asked me if I wanted to go to church with him and his family that weekend, to which I replied something along the lines of “No thanks, man; I don’t really believe in God.” This must have struck a chord with Chris because after that day, Chris never spoke to me or even acknowledged me. That was until Chris overheard a conversation I was having at school about smoking pot. Chris, like the self-righteous young jerk he was, took it upon himself to tell his very religious parents my plans, who then took it upon themselves to tell my parents. This left me grounded for two weeks.
During my time in the hole, a.k.a my bedroom, I devised a plan to put the fear of God in Chris. My bedroom window faced Chris’ bedroom and I thought about just throwing rocks at it throughout the night, but decided that wasn’t enough, because snitches get stitches. So I ended up taking fishing line and tying it to my wireless Bluetooth speaker. I made sure there was enough line to reach from my window to the bushes under Chris’ window. I then downloaded a bunch of satanic chants and satanic ritual stuff like the chant to summon the devil onto my iPod. Every night when Chris went to bed at 9 pm, I would slowly open my window and lob my Bluetooth speaker over to the bushes under Chris’ window and start playing satanic chants. This went on every night for the two weeks I was grounded, but it didn’t stop there. I saw the toll it was taking on Chris; he would look dead tired at school, and I knew he was tired because I sat there most nights watching him turn his lights back on and look out the window, and sometimes he even got his parents to go take a peek, but to no avail. I tasted blood and I was going to push Chris as far as I could. For three months, I continued this and each day I would watch Chris turn his lights on/off four to five times a night. I would set alarms on my phone throughout the night so I could wake up and mess with him, and one final alarm so I could reel in my satanic grenade before the sun came up. It got so bad to the point that there were nights I refused to go out with friends so I could stay home and mess with Chris. Apparently, this prank took a toll on Chris because his grades dropped significantly that semester, and the next year his parents put him in a private Catholic school. I never really spoke to him after that despite being neighbors.
29. Right On The Spot
Pexels @Craig Adderley
When I rented, the parking lot was assigned parking. My wife and I both had cars so I had to pay extra for the extra spot. The first one was complimentary. We come home around 1 am and some idiot is parked in my spot. Not having it, and not wanting to deal with an overnight parking ban on the street, I park behind him perpendicularly to block him in my spot. The spot next to mine was my landlord’s, who was the most chill guy I’ve ever rented from. I shot him a text explaining what I had done and to call me if he needed out before me in the morning. He laughed and said all was good.
After about an hour of watching TV, I go out for a smoke. I notice this guy’s car is running. I watch him frantically at 2 am looking around for who’s car is in the way. He sees me and starts complaining about it, not knowing it’s mine. He says he just wants to go home and doesn’t understand why some people gotta be such jerks. I told him maybe the owner of the car was mad because you were in his spot. I told him some people pay extra monthly for another spot. He gives up and goes back into his buddy’s unit. I go inside and go to bed. I go out in the morning to go out for a bit and the guy is sitting on his buddy’s doorstep. I wave and get in my car and leave. Made that jerk sit trapped all night till 9 am. The look on his face as I entered my car was priceless.
30. Roaches For You!
Pexels @Roger Brown
Not exactly my neighbor, but my landlord, who also lived in the neighborhood. A couple of decades ago, I was renting a house in the Seattle area and my landlord was a really crappy property management company (the owner lived nearby). I had a lot of arguments with them/him, and when I moved out, I cleaned the whole house, and nothing had been damaged. Regardless, they decided to keep my $850 deposit, plus they had the gall to say I owed them an additional $10 for “cleaning costs!” Right about that time, I was a victim of a violent crime, and I had to move for reasons related to that. I didn’t have the time or energy to argue with them about the $860 dollars, as I’d been hospitalized. Feeling beleaguered, I took the first apartment I could afford. It had cockroaches. I hadn’t noticed them when I was looking at the place, but after I moved in I saw them. I felt devastated, so many bad things piling up on me. That’s when I got an idea…
I started to catch the cockroaches in a jar and save them. After about a week, I had a good number of live cockroaches in my jar, so I drove down to the property management office to pay the $10. In the lobby, the secretary asked what I needed and I replied that “I thought I owed them some money but wasn’t sure how much.” The secretary got up and left the lobby to find my file, leaving me totally alone. At that point, I opened my backpack and took out the jar of roaches, opened it and let them scurry away. Within seconds, they had disappeared under floorboards and furniture. A moment later, the secretary came out and said, “Oh yes, you owe us $10.” I paid them and left with a big smile on my face. Petty revenge? Yes. Do I feel guilty? NO.
31. Puzzle It!
Unsplash (Sigmund B.)
Not a neighbor, but a roommate. So my roommate loved doing elaborate jigsaw puzzles. We weren’t that close but I knew this about her, because she was constantly doing them in the living room.
After I found out she canceled our lease, leaving me one week to find a new place to live, I threw away one piece of two different puzzles she was working on.
32. So Call Me Maybe
Freepik @tirachardz
In the mid-’90s, I was living in a triplex in a fancy city neighborhood. My new downstairs neighbor was crazy. She was just rude to people. When I rescued her cat, she grabbed the poor thing so fast that it scratched me and she didn’t even say thanks. Once, she sent my roommate, who struggled with weight, a note about his “fat footfalls keeping her up all night.” This went on for a year. The revenge was great. I was up late one night, instant-messaging a colleague over AOL instant messenger, when some random guy mistook my gender-bent username as female. Boy, did he pester me. For two hours, he KEPT SENDING MESSAGES. He just wouldn’t take “no” (served dozens of different ways) for an answer.
Finally, I broke down–Yes, I said. Yes, I will talk to you. Here is my phone number. I sent him the number of the crazy woman downstairs. Her phone rang in about two seconds. I heard her answer, and after about three seconds, she started yelling into the phone. He called her back three or four times. Each time I heard the phone ring downstairs (thin walls) I would laugh so hard I’d almost cry.
33. Mind Your Own Trash
Unsplash @Ihsan Ulusoy
I’ve had a long-standing feud with a jerk-off neighbor that started when he called the fire department for me owning a fire pit in my backyard when he’s not even on my block and I don’t even use it.
Then he went to the city library to investigate old permits on my house from 50 years ago leading to lawyer fees and several appearances before the planning board. This was all because I told him to eff off once when he came into my yard to complain about where I stored my trash can. So far, I’ve spread 5,000 catnip seeds in his yard so all the stray/outdoor cats will flock to his house. I also super glued his windshield wipers down.
34. Pee-zza Delivery
Freepik @user3802032
I lived in an apartment with a roommate. We had neighbors who would throw crazy parties pretty frequently often times during the week. One day, my roommate, who had to be awake early, had enough and decided to urinate on a metal pizza pan and stick it in the freezer.
After a crazy party broke up, he pulled the pan out and flipped it upside down giving him a frozen disc of urine. He then slid the disc under their door where it would melt on their fully carpeted entryway. I woke up to them shouting at the people who crashed there about who urinated on the floor and what the heck was wrong with them. I wish I could say they toned down their parties, but they didn’t and eventually got evicted.
35. The Tin Man’s Revenge
Freepik @bublikhaus
When I was living in dorms at college, this horrible guy in a neighboring suite kept drinking this other guy’s milk. When the horrible guy went home one weekend, the other guy got into his room and covered everything with tin foil.
He individually wrapped DVDs on a shelf, plus the bed, the walls. He literally used hundreds of yards of tinfoil. He placed plastic cups on the entire floor, all filled with water, and spelled out “not your milk” with food coloring in some of the cups. Apparently, the milk didn’t disappear after that weekend.
36. I Can Do It Too, But Better
Freepik @wayhomestudio
I used to live in an apartment building that has a shared laundry room in the basement. There are 10 washers and 10 dryers. I had a single load of laundry to do before a flight the next morning. So I headed downstairs with my basket. Two machines are running when I get down there. There’s also a single couple taking up EIGHT washers to sort their laundry. I asked politely if they could divide one of them up into 1/7ths and put it in with their others so I can use a machine. They declined because apparently they had “a system,” and tell me to wait however long it takes for the next person to claim their stuff to get the next machine. At this point, I realize it’s time to get petty.
I waited until they leave and then go hit the pause button on all of their machines. I need to stall. Then I wait for the next washer to free up. I transfer these innocent bystanders ratty old towels immediately, pay for their dryer, and leave a note to which dryer it’s in. Then I start my washer, and I hit “run” on my machine. I wait a few more minutes and then resume all of the couple’s washers. They come back down in the 40 minutes it takes to run and are mildly confused by why their machines are taking longer than usual. They suspect no foul play though. At this point, my washer is finishing up, so I grab a laundry cart and empty it out. I then take my laundry and divide it into 8 different dryers (like two shirts and a couple of socks per dryer) and set them all running, one by one, as they watch in bitter disbelief. And then I settle down in a chair to watch my $12.50 of petty revenge spin.
37. Lubed Doorknob
Freepik @mrsiraphol
During my college years, I lived off-campus, but close enough to be around all the rampant partying. There was this one girl who just had loud obnoxious parties, any random day of the week, that would go ’til 5 am. The cops would come and go, but nothing would change. People jumping off of balconies, stomping games, it was just overtly absurd. The on-site building manager was a meek woman, who probably called the cops, anonymously, but didn’t have the guts to say anything directly. At one point, this girl was on her 3rd night of a party bender, and I couldn’t handle it anymore. I drove to Walmart and bought some Vaseline. I waited until everyone had left and she was passed out on the front lawn. I could remember the sun rising.
I smeared a handful of Vaseline on her doorknob. I remember so vividly, the blood-curdling scream, the disgust, the unknown of her trying to get inside, but couldn’t. And gunk on her hands. I watched it all go down from my room through the blinds and I could see the on-site manager talking to the girl, walking away with the biggest smile on her face.
38. The “Dog” Finally Listened
Unsplash @matt-seymour
My girlfriend told me that the neighbor across the street was instructing his dog to go poop on our lawn. I doubted it, but was home sick for a few days and saw it for myself. I asked the owner to stop it, and he said the dog wouldn’t “listen.”
When I asked him to at least clean up the poop, he said his dog was only peeing. We had our own dog, and I took a week’s worth of his land mines, plus the neighbor’s dog’s poops for the week, and walked across the street and threw them all over his front yard and walkway one night. Somehow the neighbor’s dog listened after that and never pooped in my yard again.
39. The Finale Was Even Better
Freepik @KamranAydinov
When I was a kid, my family lived in a house on a street with GIANT oak trees. Because of the slope of our property, leaves from half the street would end up in our yard. My mother had really bad asthma and allergies and made us kids rake up the leaves. This was not an easy task. They would get several feet deep if we didn’t do it often enough. One day, we raked the whole yard into these giant piles for the city to come to pick up. It took several hours.
The next morning, they were scattered all over. We raked them again over several more hours and it happened again. Apparently, the neighborhood bully was knocking them over just to be a jerk. The next time we made a super huge pile around the fire hydrant hoping he’d kick them and hurt his foot. Nope; this time he decided to do a run and jump. I watched it peeking through the blinds. He ended up breaking several bones. I didn’t even feel bad.
40. Trick Or Treat
Unsplash @David Menidrey
I have a friend who had a Halloween pumpkin at the end of his driveway and it would get run over by the neighborhood jerk. It happened every year. My friend finally decided to put a stop to it. He withdrew money from his savings account so he would have enough to buy the largest pumpkin he could find. He went overboard to ensure the marauder would be very excited to see this peak of pumpkin-ness. We are talking about county-fair, blue ribbon-winning, 10,000-pies-sized pumpkin.
He also bought several large bags of Quikcrete. He filled that puppy up and made a really pretty display. The jerk broke the axle of his crappy car when he hit that pumpkin and could not drive away. My friend had the jerk’s car towed away, too.